


An Affair To Remember

by buk19



Series: Train Station Rendezvous [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Cheating, Clexa Endgame, Domestic Violence, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Infidelity, Jealous Lexa, Jealousy, Protective Lexa, Smut, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-19
Updated: 2016-08-22
Packaged: 2018-06-03 03:48:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6595342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buk19/pseuds/buk19
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke is married when she meets Lexa again after many years apart. An affair ensues.</p><p>The first time Clarke and Lexa met was purely incidental and if it weren’t for the shitty weather and both of them missing their train, their chance encounter would have been brief and insignificant to both of their lives. But the weather WAS shitty and they DID miss their trains. Everything afterwards was merely a domino effect.</p><p>***Sorta kinda inspired by the classic movie with the same name, but not really.***</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. May We Meet Again

**APRIL 20, 2010**

“No no no! Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit!”

The brunette girl looked frantic and wild as she ran for cover from the rain in the train station. Mumbling a slew of curses, she runs into a blonde. Literally runs into her. And their eyes meet. Blue and green.

“Shit”

Only this time Lexa isn’t cursing about missing her train. She’s cursing herself for running into a beautiful blonde while she surely looked like she was just a few minutes from a complete breakdown.

“Did you miss your train too or do you normally just mumble curses as you walk?”

“The latter. Do you know when the next train to the city is by any chance?”

“Not until morning I’m afraid.”

“Shit”

“I’m starting to think ‘shit’ is your favorite word.”

“After the day I’ve had maybe it is.”

“Sounds like there’s a story behind that.”

“There is. Just not one I’m comfortable sharing with a beautiful blonde stranger.”

Lexa’s eyes widen. It seems that everything she is thinking today is just flying out of her mouth. Just as she’s about to run away and cower in the corner for her uncharacteristic boldness, the blonde’s eyes soften and she chuckles.

“Well aren’t you forward. I’m Clarke. I’m 19 years old. An artist. I love to jog at night because it’s the only time I feel at peace when I’m not painting or sculpting. I’m allergic to kiwi. If you ever want to get in my good graces, buy me a pint of pistachio gelato. I could keep going but I don’t want to overload you with information.”

Lexa’s confused for obvious reasons. Why was this girl telling her a bunch of random facts about her? What was the point of all of this? Lexa knew she usually attracted crazies but something about this girl confirmed to Lexa that she wasn’t crazy. No, this girl gave Lexa butterflies. Lexa has NEVER felt butterflies before. Not even with Costia. 

“Um okay but why are you tellin-”

“Now we aren’t strangers anymore.”

“What?”

“You just look like you need a friend or atleast someone to vent to. You said you didn’t feel comfortable talking to a stranger, so I made it easier for you. Also, it looks like we are the only two people in this train station for the night, so might as well enjoy eachother’s company.”

This girl can’t be serious. Can she? Lexa narrows her eyes scanning the girl for any sign of insincerity but all she sees is blue staring back. Blue is Lexa’s new favorite color. Lexa is closed off and guarded but something about this girl calms her. And the fact that after tonight they will most likely never see eachother again, is both comforting and sad to Lexa all at once.

“I’m Lexa.”

“Nice to meet you Lexa. Now tell me a few things about yourself.”

“I’m 21. I’m a writer. I have a black belt in martial arts. I’m not allergic to anything. And to get in my good graces it takes a hell of a lot more than a pint of ice cream.”

“Gelato.”

The brunette furrows her eyebrows in confusion at the blonde’s concise reply.

“What?”

“There is a distinct difference between ice cream and gelato.”

“Tomato tomahto”

And they went on like this. Arguing about the difference between gelato and ice cream. Exchanging playful banter. Discussing some of their deepest secrets in the late hours of the night on a cold hard bench in the middle of an empty train station listening to the pitter patter sounds rain drops made as they splattered on the massive windows surrounding them. Both of their eyes were alive for the first time in a long time. Both were enveloped by the warmth of one another's company. It was completely innocent but their was a tinge of longing intertwined with each accidental touch. By 4 a.m. both had fallen asleep. Clarke was nuzzled into Lexa’s neck as Lexa rested her head on top of Clarke’s. They both woke up to the final boarding call for the 7 a.m. train to NYC. They rushed on, not wanting to miss another train no matter how much they enjoyed one another’s company. 

Clarke wanted to exchange numbers but Lexa thought it best if they didn’t. For Lexa, it would allow her to be too vulnerable - an emotion she shields herself from at all costs. And yet she just shared bits and pieces of herself with a complete stranger. Despite Clarke’s well intentions, that’s exactly what she was - a stranger. And Lexa thought it best to keep it that way. Anything more was too much for her to bear. 

Secretly though, Lexa felt as if Clarke wasn’t a stranger. There was a familiarity about her surrounded by an air of comfort that soothed Lexa to no end. She knew that after last night, Clarke definitely was more than a stranger to her.

The brunette was running away from a bad breakup to go live with her sister in the city though. She couldn’t deal with a new relationship or even a friendship. Lexa didn’t want Clarke to be a rebound but that’s exactly what she would wind up being if they pursued something now. And Lexa couldn’t imagine just being friends with this enigma in front of her. So no way of contacting one another was the best option. They still had the train ride though. They made the most of the remainder of their time together talking and laughing, ending with one chaste but oh so electric kiss. 

“Goodbye Lexa. May we meet again.”

“Goodbye Clarke. May we meet again.”

///

**JULY 8, 2011**

The next time Clarke and Lexa cross paths they don’t even realize it. Lexa was looking for a new painting to fill up some space in her new apartment. Lexa was fine with bare white walls, but Anya convinced her to go look at this gallery for a painting to spice up the place a bit. 

Apparently Anya was sleeping with a new girl this month. Ramone, was it? No. Maybe Rachel? No. Hmm. Raven! Yeah that was it. Anyways, Anya had been sleeping with Raven who just happened to have a best friend and kick ass artist who has a lot of her work featured in this small little art gallery downtown. So when Anya start complaining about how her little sister’s apartment was seriously lacking with furnishing, she first thought of that gallery downtown.

“Come on Lex. Just look around and if you see anything you like, buy the damn thing. Don’t be so difficult.”

“Okay fine. Let me go take a look around. You said you know the artist?”

“I mean she is Raven’s roommate, but since I’m usually holed up in Rae’s room screwing her brains out and blondie’s in her art studio painting, I’ve only met her once or twice.”

“God Anya too much info.”

“Relax sis you just need to get laid. It’s been a year since you and Cos-”

“Anya.”

Lexa glared in her direction. Anya took the hint. She knew mentioning Costia was a sore subject so she choose to drop it. Besides she had a new idea forming in her head.

“I’m sorry Lex. But hey I have a remedy to your dry spell. The artist! Yeah she’s hot. If it weren’t for me sleeping with her roommate I’d hit it.”

“Again Anya too much -”

“Info. Yeah yeah I got it. Soo what do you say to a double date, huh? It can be very relaxed, no pressure.”

“I don’t know An. It’s been awhile and I hate blind dates.”

“Okay how about this then, just hanging out. Me, you, Raven, and Pablo Picasso’s female equivalent at The Dropship this Friday.”

“Fine. But only because I think she’s really talented. This one especially draws me in. I can’t explain it but I feel a pull to it, like I’m experiencing deja-vu.”

The picture Lexa was pointing at was of course created by none other than Clarke Griffin, inspired by their accidental meeting. The painting was two girls sitting on a bench asleep in a train station. It immediately reminded Lexa of her and Clarke. 

Clarke. Of course Lexa remembers Clarke. Lexa believes she is the one that got away. That one regret everyone has in their life. The romantic ‘what if’ story everyone has tucked away in the crevices of their mind. I mean it probably wouldn’t have worked out. Clarke would have got bored of her or Lexa would have found out something really horrible about the blonde and called it quits. After all, nobody could be as perfect as this Clarke person seemed. Nothing can stay as perfect as the one night they had together. So instead, Lexa romanticizes the idea that Clarke was the ‘one’ for her. It’s a good way to avoid putting herself out there again.

The painting evoked such strong emotions for her she bought it on the spot, well over asking price. Once she hung it in her house later that night, her house felt a little more like a home. And it was, unknowingly to both parties, all because of Clarke Griffin.

///

**JULY 12, 2011**

_Friday night later that week…_

Raven wraps her arms around Anya’s waist and places a kiss on corner the older girl’s mouth, startling her a tad.

“Hey beautiful.”

Anya smiles into the embrace and turns her body slightly to lean in for another, much longer kiss. They stay like that, mouths moving to the beat of the club music, until the girl who came in with Raven clears her throat several several times.

“God you two are like cats in heat.” 

Raven blushes a bit at her best friend’s comment, whereas Anya just smirks.

“I like you blondie. You have sass. Maybe a smartass like you can knock some sense into my little _hot_ sister. Did I mention she’s hot?”

Clarke chuckles again. “Yes Anya you may have mentioned it once or twice. Gotta say it’s a little weird you keep talking about how hot your sister is.” 

“Hey! I’m just trying to be her wingwoman.”

“Well as good as a job you are doing, you can’t be a wingwoman without a women to help out.”

“Shit you’re right. She’s prob just running late from a meeting with her editor. Let me shoot her a text.”

 **To Lexa [9:37 P.M.]:** Where are you?! The hot artist has arrived! I repeat the painter of your apartment’s most prized and new possession is here and excited to meet you!

 **From Lexa [9:39 P.M.]:** Sorry An. I can’t make it. Tell Raven’s friend I’m sorry.

 **To Lexa [9:40 P.M]:** You can’t keep doing this to yourself. You have to put yourself out there sometime. But okay. I Love you. Have a nice night sitting in watching that silly post apocalypse show you love so much.

 **From Lexa [9:45 P.M.]:** ‘Loved’ as in past tense. Don’t even get me started on that show, they killed off bae. Have a fun night Anya. And tell your friends I’m really sorry. 

Clarke is sitting on a bar stool with Raven chugging down a Irish car bomb. The two girls are laughing and just having an all around fun time. Sigh. How Anya wishes Lexa would just come out with them. If she’s not ready to date, fine. But Clarke and Raven are fun to be around and Lexa needs a little fun.

Raven’s eyes are already unfocused when she locks gaze with her ‘friends with benefits’ Anya. 

“Babe! Where art thou sister? I don’t want to drink Clarkey over here under the table before she can make a good impression on her future wife.”

“Raven! There’s so many things wrong with what you just said. For starters, I AM the one who’s going to be drinking YOU under the table. Get it straight Reyes.”

“Ain’t nothing straight about me Grif.”

The two girls exchange banter for a bit longer before Anya cuts in.

“Sorry guys my sister isn’t coming anymore. Let’s get our drink on!”

Clarke’s face falls a bit but only for a second. Why does she care about meeting this girl she doesn’t even know? 

_C’mon Griffin get a hold of yourself. You don’t even know this mystery girl._

The trio drinks together for a bit before Raven and Anya get up to go rub up against each other on the dance floor. Clarke is only left alone for a quick minute before an attractive guy with slightly too long of hair and a bright innocent smile makes his way over to her table.

“Hey. I’m Finn. Finn Collins.”

“Nice to meet you Collins. I’m Clarke.”

///

And that’s how it went for years. Lexa and Clarke just missing each other. 

Raven and Anya stopped seeing each other a couple months later when Anya decided to accept a three year job with Doctor Without Borders across the world. They were starting to fall for eachother, starting to progress outside of their ‘fuck buddies’ mentality. But this was a chance of a lifetime, so Anya took it and Raven encouraged and supported her choice.

Lexa and Clarke ran the same trail at Central Park on Sundays, but they were both too busy in their own worlds to notice the girl they met on the train all those years ago. Lexa would occasionally buy a new painting at the gallery, but Clarke was never there when the brunette was. Clarke would visit her friend Octavia for lunch in her office every couple of weeks to catch up. Octavia worked at a private security firm on floor 10 of a major commercial building. The same major commercial building that happened to be where Lexa's book editor worked on floor 12. 

Both Clarke and Lexa think about the other from time to time. They both can’t help but wonder what if? The two girls felt a spark. No, they felt much more than a spark. It wasn’t love. But it was an intense magnetism. They felt comfortable and safe. And that was as scary a feeling as any. There was potential for something great, hell maybe even love. But the timing wasn’t right. Would the timing ever be right though?

There were so many coincidences. So many opportunities for another chance meeting just like the time they first met on the train, but it never happened. It never happened until yet again the wrong timing.

///

**AUGUST 2018**

So after 8 years, where do these two finally meet? Well of course at the goddamn train station where it all began.

Lexa just got off a long train ride from Boston, where she finished up the last leg of her book tour. She was tired, starving, and not in the mood for anyone’s shit. So obviously life has to kick her in the ass when a woman runs right into her with a searing hot cup of tea.

“Fuck! Ow.”

“Oh my god. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even see you. I wasn’t paying attention. Here let me help you clean this-”

“Clarke?”

Clarke is cut off from her ramble by a slightly familiar voice. And that’s when blue eyes lock with green for the first time in 8 years. The electricity and tension between them is still there and oh so palpable even after all this time. 

Lexa can’t believe her eyes! This is her ‘what if.” This is that girl that she couldn’t get out of her head for months. Lexa is a confident badass woman. And yet looking at this blue eyed blonde wearing a Polis U sweatshirt and yoga pants with her hair tucked away in a messy bun, is making her feel like a fumbling teenager. Apparently the sentiment is mutual, as they both stare at eachother with reddened blushes for much too long for _strangers._

“Lexa?”

“Yeah.”

Lexa replies with a sheepish “yeah.” A one word answer as she stares into blue. Blue. Blue. She can’t think straight let alone form coherent sentences. 

“Wow the years have been very kind to you Lex.”

The brunette forgot how forward the blonde was. I mean after all, they only spent one day together. It didn’t mean anything. Who are they kidding? It meant something. If they were being completely honest with themselves it meant much _much_ more than something. It was the strongest connection they’ve felt with anyone ever and the fact that it came on so quick terrified them both to the core. But people react differently to being scared. Clarke was ready to charge in headfirst, while Lexa hesitated and ran away.

“As they have been for you too Clarke.”

The brunette just then realizes how wet and sticky she is. From the tea that is. And in desperate need to change her shirt. Clarke catches on to her uncomfort.

“You know I’m staying in the hotel right next door. You can borrow some clothes, even take a shower if you’d like and we can catch up. Is that weird? I know we only met that once but I-”

“Yes I’d love to catch up Clarke.”

“Yeah?”

“Definitely. Now lead the way.”

And the playful banter ensues all the way to Clarke’s room. Lexa undresses and decides for a quick shower in Clarke’s hotel bathroom. Lexa doesn’t even think about how strange it may seem to outside people that she just followed some girl to her hotel room after spending a day and night with her once nearly a decade ago. But what outside people don’t realize is how strong that bond between Clarke and Lexa grew in their limited time together. Lexa opened up to her and shared everything with her. She told Clarke things she never even mentioned to her own sister. And Clarke told Lexa of her biggest fears, her few regrets, and many dreams. There was no denying their connection.

The brunette began replaying their literal run in from thirty minutes ago in her head, play by play. It is only then while Lexa is in Clarke’s shower smiling like an idiot that she realizes at least one thing has changed for the blonde in the past eight years. And that’s the diamond ring and wedding band that sparkled so brightly on Clarke’s rough artist hands. Well fuck.


	2. Magnets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa catch up. Lines are crossed.

**AUGUST 2018**

Clarke’s tingling with excitement. This is Lexa. The girl that made her head spin after one stolen glance. The girl who looked adorable while she pouted and cursed after missing her train. But the truth is that even though Lexa doesn’t feel like a stranger to Clarke, she is a stranger. And Clarke is eager to change that fact. They could be friends, can’t they? Nothing stood in there way of being just friends (besides the sexual tension and that goodbye kiss all those years ago, I mean).

Her impatience getting the better of her, Clarke softly knocks on the bathroom door.

“Hey Lex. Doing alright in there? I was thinking about ordering some Thai if you’re interested.”

“Oh um yeah sure. I’ll be out in a minute.”

Not five minutes later Lexa, complete with half dried frizzed curly hair, sheepishly walks out in one of Clarke’s t shirts which is of course covered in dried paint. There is something oddly comforting seeing Lexa in her shirt and sweats though. Like she’s finally home. But that thought is dangerous so the blonde decides to tuck it away in the depths of her subconscious. 

Realizing she’s been staring for too long, Clarke shyly averts her gaze.

“Sorry I don’t have any nice clothes here. Sometimes I need space from life so I come here and paint.”

“You mean you rent out a hotel room just to paint? Sounds expensive.”

“I make good money off of my commissions and my hus- my um husband makes a lot of money as well. I have a art studio attached to our townhouse, but sometimes I like to get away for the weekend, revitalized the senses you know.”

There it is. The moment of truth. Clarke has a husband. Lexa knew that ever since she realized Clarke’s wearing a ring on her finger, but hearing the blonde say the words ‘my husband’ stung a little. Lexa knew logically that it shouldn’t bother her. They barely know each other but she couldn’t help but be a little disappointed. She couldn’t help but briefly kick herself for running away that day. For not giving the girl her number. For not keeping in touch. Because maybe if they did, the blonde would be saying ‘my wife’ instead. No. That’s a dangerous foolish thought. So she tucks it away into her subconscious where not even she can access it if she wanted to.

“Yeah I completely understand. Most of the time when I have writer’s block all it takes is a change of attitude and venue.”

The blonde lets out a breath she’s been holding in. There seemed to be some tension in the room at the mention of her husband but it quickly dissipated. 

“How is your writing going?”

“Great actually. I’ve published a few books in the last few years.”

“That’s amazing! Anything I would have heard of?”

“Well my most popular book is ‘Love is weakness.’ It’s not as depressing as it sounds I swear.”

“SHUT UP! You’re Alexandria Woods?! Oh my god. I’m sorry I just love that book. I read the sequel ‘More than Survival’ in a day.”

The brunette tucked her head under her chin to stare at the floor, desperately trying to hide her blush. Sure, she’s met hundreds of her fans. Her books are popular. She would have to be blind and deaf not to see that. So yes, Lexa is used to being fawned over. She’s used to women throwing themselves at her because she’s this big fancy writer. But when those blue pools stare back at her with such awe and admiration. Well, that’s like a punch in the gut. All the air in her lungs feel like it’s being released in the time it takes to snap your fingers. She could get used to this feeling, but she can’t. Because this is a very _very_ dangerous feeling to be having for a married woman. But Lexa is stubborn. Almost as stubborn as Clarke. So they both choose to believe that they can fight these dangerous feelings.

They choose to believe they can spend the night talking and catching up as old friends. But they aren’t old friends. They aren’t even ex lovers. Their title is yet to be determined. Tonight might just be the night where they seemingly figure their supposed 'title' out.

///

“Mhmm oh god Lex. I don’t know about you but I can’t even move after that.”

“Well I mean you did consume that chicken pad thai in a matter a minutes. I doubt you’ll be able to move for a while.”

“Hey don’t food shame me! You’re not much better. If I remember correctly you did scarf down that meatball sub and groaned on and on for an hour about how bad your stomach hurt.”

“That was 8 years ago! How do you even remember that? And plus, I was hungry. Train food sucks. Leave a poor girl alone.”

“I could lie and say I have a good memory, but truth is I am just about the most forgetful person ever. I never was able to get that day, to get _you_ out of my head though.”

“Me either. Something about you Clarke. Something about that night. It has stayed with me even after all these years. It’s a very confusing feeling if I’m being honest.”

“We’ve never been anything but honest with each other Ms. Woods. There’s no reasons to start lying now.”

“In that case, I regret not staying in contact with you after that night. I regret it and I have no idea why I still think of you from time to time. But I do.”

“You know, for the longest time I was waiting to run into you again. I don’t know why either. But I knew, no I know, I want you in my life.”

The brunette’s eyes widen as her heart begins to erratically flutter. Clarke has to stop looking at her like _that_. Like she’s the world. Like she’s the center of her focus. Like there’s nothing and no one else beyond her because there _is_ someone else. And that someone else is the girl’s husband, whoever that may be. But despite that fact both lean in closer. Hesitant but excited just like the first time. There’s this pull. This unexplainable undeniable pull. 

Clarke’s lips are dangerously close to Lexa’s. Their hot breath mixes as they shake in anticipation. Hearts beating faster than they should. Bodies inching forward closer than they should. Their worlds are colliding in this one sweet moment. Once their lips touch, something goes off in both of them - something almost primal. The kiss lingers on, continuing as their hands begin to rampantly roam over one another figures. The kiss is no longer just a kiss and it is quickly verging into territory that is no longer innocent. 

Lexa can’t get enough. Clarke smells like strawberries and fresh linens. Her mouth tastes of red wine and chicken pad thai, but it’s perfect. Everything about this moment shocks her alive. Everything is going so fast: her mind, her hands, her mouth, her heart. The curves of their bodies meld together as if it was made with that exact intention in mind. Soon Clarke is on top of her, clawing at her scalp. The brunette moans quietly into the kiss, trying to contain herself, trying to think about why this is so wrong. To remind herself that this is wrong. But it doesn’t feel wrong. It feels like the only right thing she’s done in awhile. Her body is tingling and her mind is racing. A familiar ache conjures up in her lower stomach. This feels so right. This feels so wrong. This feels so -

Her thoughts are cut off as the blonde all but throws herself off of the couch. Clarke is crouching over, grabbing at her swollen lips as if to check if that really just happened. Lexa is panting, trying but failing to catch her breath. Trying to return back to her normal fine composure, yet again failing miserably. Because they both know what they are doing is wrong. It’s oh so wrong. The only thing forcing them apart is the shiny rock on Clarke’s finger. So they both stare at the offending object as if staring at it long enough will allow it to disappear. But it doesn’t. Of course it doesn’t.

A few moments later, after their heart beats normalize. Their actions begin to sink in not with just their bodies, but their minds. Both girls share wide eyes tinged with fear. Clarke is the first to speak.

“Fuck! Fuck. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I - I obviously am attracted to you, but that’s no excuse. I can’t believe I just did that. I shouldn’t have done that I - I’m -”

“You’re married.”

Lexa timidly interrupts, not quite able to meet the blue eyed beauty’s gaze.

“You’re married. And that can’t happen again. I know that. I can’t deny that I want to spend time with you Clarke. Get to know you. Keep you in my life. I’ll regret walking away again, but you’re married.”

For a moment, it looks as if Clarke is going to argue with Lexa, argue that she’s not married. But she is. She can’t change that fact. She has a husband. Finn. Finn Collins. Son of Senator Preston Collins. Everything in her life would be ruined if this came out. Not only her hard work as an artist, but her family’s reputation. Her step-father is the Mayor. Her mother is running for a seat in senate next election. She can’t do this. No the fact is, is that she is married. And she barely knows this girl. _She barely knows this girl._ That’s all she has to keep telling herself. All she has to do is lie.

“I’m married.”

Clarke’s voice is quiet and defeated. Quieter than Lexa has ever heard her before. The brunette feels the need to soothe the younger girl standing in front of her. It’s as if Lexa saying ‘you’re married’ to the blonde pained her. It’s as if Lexa insulted her just by stating fact.

“I’m married.”

Clarke says it again, as if she’s reminding herself.

“Are you repeating that for me or for yourself, Klark?”

“I don’t know. Maybe a bit of both.”

Lexa takes one of the girl’s shaking hand, while tucking a strand of blonde tousled hair behind Clarke’s ear with her free hand.

“I can leave right now. It took eight years to run into one another again. More likely than not, we will never cross paths again.”

Clarke’s response was almost immediate.

“I don’t want that.”

“You’re married Clarke. Whatever just happened, it can’t -”

“Happen again. I know. I’m not trying to make you a mistress Lexa. I feel like I already know you better than I've ever known anyone. But still, I want to know more. I want to be in your life in some capacity. Considering what just occurred I don’t think it would be too forward to ask to be your friend?”

“I would love to be your friend Clarke, but do you think that’s possible?”

“What? To be just friends?”

Lexa looked down to the floor and mumbled a small “yes.”

“There’s obviously a connection here. An attraction. But that’s not something we have to act on. We aren’t animals. Despite what just happened, I think we can control ourselves around each other if we put in the effort.”

Lexa hesitantly meets her gazes.  


“So friends?”

“Friends.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you guys think?? How long do you think Clarke and Lexa can keep up the 'just friends' charade? Finn will be introduced soon unfortunately and ruin all their fun (for now).


	3. Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Past two months of Clarke and Lexa's frienship explained.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing really happens in this chapter, just some insight in Clarke and Lexa's perspective of the past few months. The following few chapters are when some real drama will ensue!
> 
> My apologies for any grammar and spelling mistakes you may find btw

Clarke and Lexa remained true to their word. For almost two months, the two girls have enjoyed each other's presence as “friends.” The tension is still there and oh so palpable, but they try to ignore it’s intensity. They only meet up in public. Perhaps on a subconscious level they know it’s smart to meet strictly in places where they can’t allow their deepest desires to consume them. 

They begin to have a routine after a few weeks of hanging out. Clarke meets Lexa for coffee on Tuesday afternoons near the brunette’s editor’s building. They realize that every Tuesday Lexa was on floor 12 in yet another tedious meeting about her current book, Clarke was on floor 10 eating sushi with her friend Octavia catching up on their week. That was the first coincidence they caught on to. 

The second coincidence is that both of them run the same trail in Central Park every week. So now on Sundays, Lexa and Clarke meet up at 9 a.m. sharp for a intense run in the park. After they were all sweaty and overexerted, they go home and shower (separately) and then meet up again to visit one of the many art galleries open in the city. The gallery would vary depending on the mood the artist was in. But without fail, Sunday nights Clarke’s alive with inspiration. And while Clarke is painting more fervent than she has in years, Lexa is writing with more enthusiasm than she has ever. 

Two months of longing glances and stolen touches. Two months of pent up desires. Two months of complete and utter denial on both of their parts. 

Clarke never mentions her husband who shall not be named. Finn Collins is an entitled asshole with a silver spoon permanently up his ass from what Lexa can tell. The one time Clarke mentioned him she let it slip that he was on a business trip in San Francisco with his father, Preston Collins. Lexa knew the name sounded familiar. It only took a quick Google search to realize that Clarke’s in laws were political royalty. The Collins have been in the game of politics for generations it seems. Finn’s grandfather was even Secretary of State years ago. 

Lexa promised herself she wouldn’t go down the rabbit hole and search up Clarke’s husband. She only briefly looked up her father in law out of pure curiosity. If Clarke didn’t share this part of her life with her, she had no right to pry. But from what she did read all those weeks ago about the Collins, it seems they were used to getting anything they wanted with little to no questions asked. It angered Lexa that Clarke seemed to be one of those things.

Lexa may not know much about Finn Collins, but she knows in her bones that he doesn’t deserve to be with Clarke. Clarke, who is so pure of heart. Clarke, who is so selfless. Clarke, the girl who was successfully restarted her heart so that she no longer permanently feels numb. No. Now Lexa feels warm and at ease whenever the blonde is around. To say the least, this “just friends” thing is killing her.

Lexa would never make a move on a married woman though. Even if said married woman is none other than Clarke Griffin. Because Lexa cares for Clarke enough that she wouldn’t do anything to ruin her happiness. And if Clarke is happy with Finn, then she will fill the role of just her “friend.” Ever since that day in the hotel room, Lexa has been good. She never touches her for longer than necessary and tries her best not to give off what her sister calls “classic Lex heart eyes.” 

Lexa has (reluctantly) accepted the fact that she will never be able to feel Clarke’s touch, watch her squirm in pleasure, hear Clarke moan under her, or even just hold her as they drift off into dreamless sleeps. She’s okay with being just Clarke’s friend because truth be told, the blonde has turned her world upside down in the best way possible. She’s writing better than she has in years (if ever) and she’s smiling again. Not a contrived smile to assure the world that she’s alright. No. Lexa is smiling like a giddy schoolgirl. A smile so pure it not only meets her eyes, it consumes her whole being. It’s inexplainable how fast these feelings have hit her, but she’s glad they have. She will never regret being consumed by the fierce and loving entity that is Clarke Griffin.

///

Clarke hated cheaters. She believed that there was no excuse for cheating. Clarke is now a hypocrite. 

When the blonde was 16 years old, she met a girl named Niylah. Niylah was the daughter of a the owner of very successful pharmacy company in D.C. Clarke’s mother was thrilled that her daughter had found a “suitable” partner. Really though, Abby was happy for the good press this could equal. None of that mattered to Clarke. Niylah was the first girl Clarke ever kissed. She was Clarke’s first love, first everything. They were together for a year until Clarke stumbled in on Niylah and some bitch named Ontari having sex at a party. For months, Niylah tried to get Clarke back. Promising it was the first and last time. After about 5 months, Clarke gave in and decided to give Niylah another chance. After all, she loved the girl and Niylah swore it was a drunken mistake.

It turns out it wasn’t a drunken mistake and it wasn’t the first time. Niylah was screwing Ontari since that night. And before that she slept with at least three other girls to Clarke’s knowledge while they were together. Turns out, Niylah was just as much an opportunist as the rest of D.C. politicians. The press was good and Clarke was a “good lay who was passably cute” in Niylah’s words. So when she was 18, Clarke left D.C. heartbroken and moved to New York for art school, leaving behind the fucked up world of politics.

So cheating was a sore subject for Clarke. And yet here she is engaging in an emotional affair. Because who are we kidding, that’s exactly what this is. She never mentions Lexa to Finn, not that he would care anyways. 

Finn Collins was once a sweet guy. Finn and her met at a bar after a failed blind date. She was marinating in self pity when a decent looking boy (because under no circumstance was Finn Collins a man) came up to her with a wide smile and a shit ton of compliments. And it was an ego boost. It was rare that Clarke Griffin needed nor wanted an ego boost but the night she met Finn was one of those times.

He said all the right things. He was polite and respectful, but still funny and daring. Sure, he seemed to be a bit selfish and egotistical but Clarke was willing to look past it for the time being. After all, she wasn’t looking for anything serious with him. 

Finn started taking her on cute little dates. He spent so much time planning adventures for them to go on. After two months of dating, he flew her to a one night only art exhibit in L.A. featuring three of her favorite artists. It was thoughtful. He was thoughtful. So Clarke let him woo her.

Clarke loved Finn for the facade he portrayed. She thought he was a sweet, idealistic boy with doe eyes and too much hope for peace. Then Finn changed. Finn was after all Preston Collins son. For the two years they dated, Finn expressed no interest in continuing in the family business. Then something snapped. Right after Finn and her got married, however, he slowly changed.

Soon he was always dragging her to his father’s galas (the same galas he used to detest). He would bring her along on long tedious business dinners, treating her more like a trophy then his artistic intelligent fiancee. When people used to ask about her profession, Finn _used_ to go on a twenty minute rant about how intricate her art is. How she went to art school at the best school in the country and still managed to graduate top of her class with a promise of employment at one of the best art galleries in the city. But now, Finn waves off the question with such disinterest in his eyes. Now all he says is “A profession? No, my Clarke here is more much too invested her little hobbies to have a profession. My mother has been trying to convince her to join the board for a few of her charities though. Us Collins are very much invested in philanthropy, raising up the community with our donations.”

For years, Finn was still loving and compassionate in private. In public though, he played the part of a uninterested husband. Soon enough, that’s exactly what he became. Uninterested. So Finn doesn’t care that Clarke made a new “friend.” Finn doesn’t even care if he sees Clarke on a daily basis. As long as she’s home at night to warm his bed and arrives at every gala looking regal and elegant by his side. 

Clarke put up with him for the sake of her art, for her family, and a small part of her hopes that their marriage can be salvaged. Not to mention the fact that, Finn’s family basically owns New York. They own the buildings of all of Clarke’s galleries and know everyone and anyone in the art world. Clarke might have made it on her own, but if she were to divorce Finn, all her work would be down the drain. She would be put on the unofficial blacklist. Never did she imagine that her love life would play such an integral role in her art. 

Her art got her through her father’s death, her first heartbreak, her first few lonely months in a new city. Clarke’s life **is** her art. To give that away to get out of a loveless marriage would break her heart. Besides Finn doesn’t bother her. He’s too caught up in his own world. He never mistreated her either, So why go through with a divorce? Sure she can’t find true love but she never found anyone worthy of her time anyways. Atleast not until Lexa.

Lexa is a new and very complicated addition to Clarke’s life. It’s more than sexual attraction. Lexa fills Clarke with feelings of peace. Feelings of love. Lexa looks at her like she is the world. Lexa makes her laugh harder than Finn ever did, even before his 360 change. She even opened up to Lexa more than she has with anyone. Lexa knows about her whole life, except Finn. Clarke thinks that if she introduces Finn into her world of Lexa, the denial she’s feeling would pierce the bubble. Because Clarke will have to admit to herself (more so than she already has) that Lexa is more than a friend. And it will also force her to admit that even though she doesn’t feel like she has a husband she without a doubt does.

So two months into their “friendship” when Lexa does in fact meet Finn, the bubble is most definitely popped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this chapter is a bit off. I'm not that happy with it but I figured I might as well post a short little chapter today. I'm gonna try and post a slightly longer chapter tomorrow or the next day involving a Clexa run in with Finn! 
> 
> I'm open to comments on where you'd like the story to go as well! Can't promise I'll follow them, but I'm definitely open to your opinions as well as some constructive criticism if you have any :))


	4. Cheater, Cheater

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa finally meets the infamous Finn Collins. Will this run in bring the girls closer or farther apart??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry in advance for any mistakes! 
> 
> Just wanted to thank you guys so much for all the comments and kudos. Love you all :)

Lexa is patiently waiting at their usual coffee spot for the blonde beauty who has made a habit of never being on time for anything and today seems to be no different. The brunette smiles to herself as she sees Clarke stumble through the door looking quite disheveled with her hair wild. 

“Hey Lex! I’m so sorry I’m late.” 

Clarke goes in for a hug and quick kiss on the cheek. Lexa learned a few weeks ago that Clarke is a very touchy person and it's unfortunately not just exclusive to her. When Clarke forgot her purse in the coffee shop last week and the waiter ran out to give it to her, she gave him a big bear hug. When she meets potential new clients, she gives them a quick hug and peck on the cheek. Logically, Lexa knows that Clarke’s hugs and kisses are not special or laced with any meaning besides being cordial. But Lexa’s fluttering heart speeds up tenfold whenever the blonde is in such close proximity. The kind of proximity where Lexa can breathe in strawberries and linens - Clarke’s signature scent. The kind of proximity where she can feel Clarke’s warm breath on her cheek as she leans in to press her lips against the brunette’s skin instantly making the older girl wish those lips would never leave her body again.

Drawing out from the haze that is the blonde artist, the duo sits down to engage in their usual flow of conversation. They go on like this mostly discussing Lexa’s new book obsession for about twenty minutes until Clarke’s phone begins to vibrate. The blonde looks annoyed by the interruption but nonetheless responds to the text.

“Shit!”

“Is everything okay? And I thought ‘shit’ was my favorite word.”

Clarke smirked at the older girl’s comment. It’s very rare to see Lexa sentimental or witty. So to see her in both forms at the same time was something to relish in.

“Yeah everything is okay, I just spaced out on my realtor. I’m suppose to meet her in 15 minutes to look at a new space for one of my galleries.”

“Oh. Well you should get on your way then.”

Lexa tries really _really_ hard not to sound disappointed. The writers schools her face, forcing a warm smile encouraging the girl to leave. They both have lives outside of one another. It’s completely understandable that she has to go. Lexa is perfectly capable of waiting five days until Sunday when she can see Clarke again.

“You’re not getting rid of me that easy Woods. C’mon I want your opinion on the space. You don’t mind do you?”

“Of course not Clarke. I love spending time with you.”

Lexa can see the blush in Clarke’s cheeks rising. Sometimes Lexa says things just to see that rosy red flush flutter to the artist’s pale skin. Clarke is just too cute when she’s all flustered. 

Clarke grabs Lexa’s hand and tugs her out of the coffee shop. Initially when Clarke grabbed Lexa’s hand, she just meant to pull her out of the shop and drag her the right way since Lexa is horrible (and I mean horrible) with directions. But then Clarke melted into the girl’s touch. Lexa’s hands were so warm and velvety. You can’t blame a girl for not wanting to let go of such soft hands. 

Clarke’s hands are rough from sculpting and sketching and painting. It was the perfect balance. Almost like Yin and Yang. And that’s the best way to explain Lexa and Clarke in general. Where Lexa is more reserved, Clarke is sociable and open. Where Clarke is impulsive and emotional, Lexa is cautious and logical. They balanced each other out. 

The walk to the gallery space was much too short for Clarke and Lexa’s liking, perhaps because neither wanted to remove their hands from the other’s warmth. When they arrived, the realtor was waiting for them on the corner of the property wearing designer clothing and a disheartening smile. Just from one look, Lexa knew this woman was not sincere.

“Mrs. _Collins_! Hello. I’m Rowena Franklin. Your husband’s father, Senator Preston, plays golf with my father all the time. You must have heard of my family. We own the Franklin Industries franchise. It’s great to finally meet you. Although I was hoping your husband would be joining us instead of your assistant.”

Yep. Lexa did not like this woman. This woman who wore designer clothes as if she needed to prove her wealth like her life depended on it. She was just another rich bitch who felt the need to name drop not only Clarke’s connections but also her own. 

Of course this opportunist would look at Clarke as merely a chess piece in her ill attempts to rise in the social hierarchy of New York City society. Too bad she was talking to Clarke Griffin. The artist who prefers to stay out of the limelight. The blonde enigma that might accompany her husband to banquets here and there, but avoids the social politics that come with being a Collins. In fact, Clarke isn’t even a Collins. She kept her name despite Finn’s protests. So being diminished to merely Finn’s wife infuriated her, not to mention the fact she also looked at Lexa as if she was beneath her. No. Nobody can look at Lexa like that. Lexa is a better person than this Rowena Franklin. Hell, Lexa has quite a large sum of money herself not that she feels the need to flaunt such things. And her money is all self made. She worked to the tooth and nail to pour her heart and soul into her books. Meanwhile, Rowena Franklin probably was born with a silver spoon in her mouth - unsurprisingly just like Finn.

“Actually Mrs. _Franco_ , you can call me Mrs. Griffin or just Clarke. I am not Mrs. Collins, that’s my mother in law. And this is not my assistant. This is my close friend Lexa Woods. Now if you don’t mind, can you please show us the space?”

“It’s Mrs. Franklin actually.” The redhead social climber defeatedly mumbles under her breath. 

“What was that Mrs. _Franks_? I didn’t quite catch that.”

At that, Lexa stops short of laughing out loud. Clarke wears a knowing smirk paired with eyes crazed with mischief. Apparently, Clarke can’t stand to be in the company of this realtor either.

“Oh nothing Mrs. Griffin. Let me show you and your _friend_ the space.”

It’s in that moment that Lexa realizes Clarke is still holding her hand. I’m sure that hardly looked platonic. But I mean one could argue that friends hold hands right? Of course. Yeah. Lexa always used to hold Ontari’s hand. Well I mean they were six years old so obviously the situation is a bit different here. Clarke realizes what the realtor is alluding to and quickly removes from Lexa’s grasp, instantly missing the older girl’s loving touch. 

///

The space gives off an eclectic vibe that is so very Clarke. Lexa had been expecting fine lines and contemporary designs. But no, this space was homey and warm. It’s perfect for Clarke she thought.

Rowena, the realtor from hell, continued to prattle on incessantly about her father’s wealth and how the Collins and her family should do a monthly brunch together. Midway through her rant about her new designer shoes, in walks a man clad in a crisp black suit with gelled hair and a smug smile. 

Lexa felt a shiver through her spine because she knew. She knew that this man standing in front of her was none other than Finn Collins. She could just tell in the way he carried him - with all too much confidence and not enough modesty.

Of course Rowena perks up when he arrives. Flying over to him in a split second to shower him with the praises he expects to gain when he saunters into a room. Clarke, however, was a mixture of disinterested and shocked. She looked pissed off actually.

“Well if it isn’t my gorgeous wife!”

The boy grabs Clarke by the waist and pulls her in close to press a hard kiss to the blonde’s pursed lips. It wasn’t sweet or loving. No this was a power move and a very well executed one at that because it had Lexa’s heart falling to depths it has never beared witness to before. Seeing Clarke kiss someone else (well be kissed by someone else atleast) was heartbreaking to say the least.

“Finn, what are you doing here? You never come and support my work anymore.”

Clarke’s face is all smiles but lacks her usual warmth. Instead her eyes are boring holes into the back of her husband’s head as he turns around to take in the gallery space before him.

“Just wanted to see where our money is going _sweetie_. This place sure is _interesting_. Not sure it's up to par with my expectations. It’s just too modest for my tastes.”

Of course the ever so pretentious Finn Collins cannot appreciate the beauty in simplicity, but that’s not a shocker. In fact, it’s to be expected.

“Well _babe_ , I pay for all my gallery spaces with my money so it really shouldn’t involve you.”

“Everything about you involves me Clarke. You’re _my wife_.”

“How could I forget that I’m married to Finn Collins.”

“Exactly. Who would ever want to forget marrying a Collins?”

Wow okay. First Lexa thought she was imagining it but there is definitely tension in the air. The level of hostility between Clarke and Finn is off the charts. Even the cute little pet names they say to one another seem like insults. Hell, even Rowena has the decency to pick up on the subtle cues and distract herself by staring ever so intently at the ground as if it was the most interesting thing around. And for once, Lexa has to agree with her.

Clarke rolls her eyes and looks over to Lexa with those entrancing blue eyes heavy with apologies better left unsaid. Finn’s gaze follows his wife and lands on the brunnette in the room who has otherwise remained silent up until now.

His eyes brighten immediately and his whole demeanor shifts as he hungrily looks Lexa up and down. Lexa politely clears her throat but really all she wants to do right now is punch his smug face in.

“I don’t believe we have met. I’m Finn Collins _obviously_. And you are?”

“Lexa Woods. A friend of Clarke’s.”

 _‘Just a friend my ass’_ both girls think in their mind.

“Well any friend of my wife’s is a friend of mine. You’ll be joining us for dinner sometime next week Lexa. I want to get to know you _much_ better.”

Lexa was both shocked and disgusted by Finn’s forward nature, not to mention the fact that he was blatantly flirting with his wife’s friend _right in front of his wife_. But Clarke on the other hand was entirely too used to this kind of behavior. The blonde used to get upset by Finn’s flirty behavior. Whenever Clarke would confront him in the past, he claimed he was only being friendly. He claimed socializing is a key aspect of why the Collins thrive. Soon enough she stopped caring who he flirted with. It was then that she realized she was slowly no longer caring about her husband altogether. 

“Finn you can’t just declare that she has to join us for dinner. Besides I’m sure Lexa is busy.”

Clarke rolls her eyes at her husband’s smug face. It looks as if she wants to punch his face as much as Lexa does.

“Nonsense. I just want to get to know your new friend Clarke. You’re always complaining that I’m not present enough in your life. Well here I am. Now come on, I want you home with me tonight. I want to spend some extra time with my beautiful wife. I have no meetings until tomorrow afternoon so we can stay in bed all day.”

And there goes Lexa’s heart again. Cracking more and more with each word out of the bastard’s mouth. She knows she has no right to be jealous or angry that Finn gets to take Clarke's home with him because they _are_ together (for whatever reason, Lexa does not know). The brunette’s jaw clenches at Finn’s words because she doesn’t want to imagine this over privileged prick’s meaty hands all over the stunning creamy goodness that stands before her. She has to accept the fact that Clarke isn’t hers though and never will be. And although it doesn’t seem like it, Clarke loves her husband. Right? I mean, why else would she stay married to him? 

“I actually have plans with Lexa.”

_Wait what?!_

Finn scowls as Lexa has to refrain from smiling like an idiot right there and then.

“But baby I miss you.”

Finn steps closer to the blonde and grabs her from behind, kissing her hair and whispering in her ear. Now Lexa is just uncomfortable and so is Clarke judging by how quickly she removes herself from Finn’s embrace.

“I’m sorry but we have concert tickets. I can’t cancel. I’m sure you can find something to do with your time.”

The silent _‘someone to do’_ Clarke insinuated does not go unnoticed by Finn who now moves his attention to the realtor. He starts out innocently asking about the ceiling lighting for the space (but really all Finn wants is for the redhead to be looking up at his bedroom ceiling for the night).

If Finn was any other guy, Clarke would feel bad for blowing off her husband and blatantly lying about having other plans. But Clarke knows that Finn doesn’t miss her. Finn misses fucking her. Finn misses having her as a warm body underneath him after a long hard day at work. Finn never cares about her ‘little hobbies’ as he says, so why does he care now? It’s rare that Finn goes out looking for her like this. 

_'He must really be desperate for a good screw'_ Clarke thinks.

After all, Clarke and Finn haven’t had sex for two months. Clarke isn’t dumb she knows Finn would probably be getting it from someone else if he had the time to go out and find a decent lay that wouldn’t cause a scandal. That’s why it’s so much easier and safer for him to seek out Clarke to satisfy his needs as they arise. It’s fucked up and both Clarke and Finn know it. 

So when Finn is off in the next room flirting with the realtor, she can’t find the power to will herself to care. Maybe once upon a time she cared but now she’s gotten off her high horse. Finn isn’t a good guy (certainly not a good husband either), so what’s the harm in a little white lie? Well the harm is where that white lie will lead her. And this time, it leads her straight into Lexa’s bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah that happened. There may or may not be some smut in the next chapter?? Still undecided. What do you guys think?


	5. Montauk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke takes Lexa to her favorite place in the world. Lexa and Clarke stop denying the inevitable. Things start happening yay!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I noticed I tend to keep switching between past and present tense so if you pick up on that, my apologies! That's always been a weak point for me. Otherwise, enjoy!

Lexa was shocked yet again. Clarke just lied to her husband. She turned him down.. to spend time with her? Why would she do that? Up until witnessing Clarke and Finn's interactions firsthand, Lexa thought their marriage was the epitome of love. At least that's what she convinced herself. She needed to believe that Clarke was happy and in love because although it might painful to the older girl that Clarke loved another, it gave Lexa the motivation to keep her distance. But now. Now she has a strong feeling that Clarke and Finn are more strangers than husband and wife. Clarke and Finn aren't in love it's obvious. Finn is probably cheating on Clarke right now with that realtor chick and Clarke doesn't even seem to care! Lexa is baffled but also intrigued. She can't lie and say she's not happy because she is. Clarke chose her over Finn, at least for the night. Well that's not true. Maybe Clarke just needed an excuse and Lexa was there. But still, Lexa can't help but hope Clarke wanted to be with her instead of her husband. How fucked up is that?

"Lex? I'm sorry about that. I'll explain everything later if you want. You must be confused. Right now though, do you want to do something fun?"

An explanation. Yes, an explanation would be lovely and oh so enlightening. Because right now Lexa has whiplash from all the emotions she's felt in the past half hour.

"Sure Clarke. What did you have in mind?"

The blonde lightly bites down on her bottom lip still managing to maintain her trademark mischievous smirk.

"You'll see."

"Claaaarke! Give me a hint at least?"

Clarke leans in to Lexa's body to whisper in one of Lexa's petite ears. Lexa, meanwhile, tries to control her erratic heartbeat as the blonde lips are ghosting her skin causing the brunette to shudder at the motion.

"Okay your one hint Ms. Woods is that I plan on getting you very very wet."

What Lexa wants to say is 'Mission accomplished Griffin' but instead she chooses to clamp her mouth shut for fear of the inaudible moans and desperate gasps that might escape her mouth just from the slightest of almost touches from the artist. Yes this girl will be the death of her she's sure of it.

///

“Ok first thing is first. Do you have any plans for tomorrow?”

Clarke spares her a smirk before turning her attention back to the road. Lexa waited outside of Clarke’s townhouse as she picked up the car keys to her Range Rover. The older girl preferred waiting outside of the house because then she could pretend it was just Clarke’s house not Clarke and _her husband's_ house.

“Tomorrow? Plan on keeping me out all night Griffin?”

“Maybe I am Woods. Is that a problem?”

Ok flirting. Definitely flirting. All Lexa knew right now was that Clarke planned on getting her ‘very wet’ and keeping her out all night. This isn’t just wishful thinking on her part right? No, this was blatant shameless flirting from the blonde.

“Definitely not.”

“Good then. Get ready for a long car ride. I warn you though I get pretty into singing on road trips so join or die.”

“Where are you taking me Clarke?”

This time when Clarke looks over her face has softened and she’s no longer being playful. There’s something more raw and honest in her eyes like she’s about to tell me her best kept secret.

“To my favorite place in the world of course.”

And Lexa knew she meant it.

///

Lexa fell asleep 30 minutes into the car ride listening to Clarke belt out some of Elton John’s greatest hits. Clarke’s voice was husky but sweet - a wonderful tantalizing contradiction. The blonde’s voice carried her into one of the softest sleeps she’s experienced in a long time.

About two hours later, she felt a gentle hand pushing the stray hairs out of her face calling out to her to wake up. How dare someone interrupt her from this peaceful slumber?! Her eyes fluttered open prepared to yell at whoever had the balls to wake her up until her eyes met blue. Ok so Clarke is the only person who can wake Lexa up and live to see the next day apparently. _Interesting_.

“C’mon sleepyhead wake up. We’re here.”

“Mmm Klark no. Come back to bed.”

Obviously still half asleep, Lexa flails her arms searching for contact. She tugs on Clarke’s arm and only when she hears the blonde giggle does she fully wake up and realize that 1.) they most definitely aren’t in bed and 2.) she is drooling all over Clarke’s passenger seat probably looking like a disheveled wreck. Lexa mumbles a quick sorry and throws a sheepish smile the blonde’s way.

“You’re so cute when you’re embarrassed.”

“I’m not embarrassed Klark.” Lexa defeatedly mumbles.

“Oh no? So that reddish blush creeping up on your cheeks, I suppose that’s just sunburn or something right?” There it is that goddamn perfect smirk again. Lexa could melt just looking at it.

“Shutup Griffin.” Finally taking in their surroundings, Lexa notices they’re at the beach. The ocean looks calm as the waves crash together in serene motions. There a few feet away from the beach parked near a cute little cottage like beach house right on the waterfront. It’s gorgeous, but it definitely doesn’t seem up to par with the Collins snobby tastes.

The house looks a little worn in, in the best way possible though. It looks lived in. Like each loose ceiling tile has a story. Like the beaten stone path leading to the porch carries the footprints of a little Clarke running back home after collecting seashells at the shore. She could just tell that this home was all Clarke and _only_ Clarke.

“Is this yours?”

“Yeah. It was my Dad’s before he died. He left it to me, so when I was 18 the deed was changed to my name.”

“It’s beautiful.”

Clarke’s eyes twinkled as she looked at the home. This really was her favorite place. Lexa could tell it was close to her heart. The fact that she trusted Lexa enough to bring her here warmed the writer’s heart.

“Yeah. I think so too. My mom wanted to sell it but I wouldn’t let her. My mom and dad got divorced when I was young. He wasn’t into the whole lying and politics world and my mom was. He was an artist. This was his oasis, so now I guess it’s mine too.”

“I’m glad you trusted me enough to bring me here Klark.”

“You know I’ve never brought anyone here before.”

If Clarke saw the shock written on Lexa’s face, she ignored it and continued saying the words that were giving Lexa more and more hope that this intense pull she felt towards the blonde was mutual. That she wasn’t alone in this.

“I think my mom assumes I sold it a couple years ago. Finn doesn’t even know about it. Raven and Octavia know about it but that’s it.”

“Why did you take me here Klark?” It’s a whisper. Like she’s almost afraid of the answer but also so eager to find out. It’s like she’s just decided to take the plunge and jump off a plane. You know that feeling when you’re freefalling in the sky nervous about pulling the parachute because that parachute could mean floating gracefully out of the sky back to your home or freefalling to your death.

“Because you’re you. Because you make me happy and I wanted to bring you somewhere I know you’d be happy too.”

“I’m always happy with you Klark.”

There’s a split second where Lexa could swear Clarke was staring at her lips. Her eyes were a storm of contradictions. It was like she had an angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other. _Should I kiss her? No Lexa No. She has a husband. Yeah but he's an asshole. But he's still her husband. God though. Look at those lips. Those perfect fucking lips. I could just lean over and -"_

“C’mon Lex I’ll give you a tour.”

Moment over thank god. Lexa thought in that moment that she was about to make the biggest mistake of her life. That kiss would have ruined her friendship with Clarke. If only she knew that kissing Clarke certainly wouldn’t have been a mistake nor as unwelcome as she presumed.

///

After the tour, Clarke took her to a nearby farmer’s market. She told Lexa she was going to cook for her and even though Lexa insisted she could help, she refused.

They walked around for about fifteen minutes before Clarke casually slipped her hand into Lexa’s under the guise of wanting to show her something at one of the stands. But really Clarke just wanted to feel the sensation of Lexa’s cool hands in hers again. The feeling was safe - like home. And that’s why she brought Lexa here to Montauk. Because Lexa felt so much like her home away from home and since Montauk always felt like her home, she just wanted to combine the two at least for night. Was it selfish? Maybe. But holding Lexa’s hand, walking through the street fair felt so right. They tried samples and playfully argued about which batch of arugula was fresher and whether to pick farm raised or wild caught salmon. It felt so normal. Like they had this domestic routine. It scared Clarke, but it wasn’t a bad feeling. Montauk was always a fantasy world for her where she could escape from reality. So maybe this could be the fantasy world where she could have Lexa as well?

///

Lexa was watching Clarke in awe as the younger girl’s hips swayed to the rhythm of the music blasting from the little cheap radio in the corner of the modest kitchen. She huskily sang out the lyrics to the song playing in the baclground. And boy did her voice do things to Lexa.

_“Black velvet with that slow southern style. A new religion that'll bring ya to your knees. Black velvet if you please”_

Clarke could make anything sexy, even chopping carrots apparently. Lexa bit her lip trying so hard to ignore the heat rising in her body and the images flying through her mind by the minute. It would be so much easier if Lexa never felt Clarke on top of her. Felt her tongue explore the roof of her mouth in soft swift motions. It would be so much easier to turn off this desire if she only had her imagination to refer to. But no. Lexa has had a taste of Clarke and that’s all she’ll ever get. And that’s the most frustrating part of this whole ordeal.

“Mmm Lex. Taste this.”

Clarke holds up a spoonful of some savory sauce to Lexa’s lips. God were her lips plump. Clarke couldn’t control her eyes from drifting to those delicious lips. Flashbacks roll like a home movie in her mind. Images of Lexa panting with those lips swollen from Clarke’s incessant sucking on them flood her senses. Suddenly the whole room feels hot and then Lexa moans. _Fuck did she really have to moan? What is she doing to me?_

Lexa moans for a second time after tasting the sauce. The brunette’s eyes are closed as she licks her lips savoring the flavor of the spices. This girl is doing things to Clarke. Things that a women with a husband shouldn’t want to act on. But she wants to desperately. Oh how much she wants to. The timing doesn’t feel right though. Truthfully, it might never be right. And she refuses to make Lexa into the other woman. She wouldn’t make the first move. She couldn’t. Lexa was too good for her. She deserves someone who could hold her close in public and kiss her passionately in front of her friends. She deserved more than what Clarke could give her - _at least while she was still married to asshole Finn Collins_.

So instead of leaning in to claim Lexa’s lips, she places her thumb at the corner of Lexa’s mouth wiping away the remnants of the sauce the girl’s lips left in its wake. Clarke subconsciously brings her thumb to her own lips now and sucks it dry of the flavor. She doesn’t even notice Lexa’s eyes darken with desire as she goes back to busying herself with the cooking.

/// 

“Fuck Klark. That was amazing.”

“Yeah?”

“Hell yeah. Who knew you could cook?”

“Not a lot of people actually. It’s a well kept secret.”

“Seems like you’re sharing a lot of secrets with me today.”

“I’m just as surprised as you are. I don't usually trust this easily.”

“So what makes me the exception then?”

Clarke pauses for a moment to try to come up with a genuine answer, but it’s a question she’s asked herself many times as well. She has yet to come up with an answer.

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out as well.”

Clarke takes the brunette’s hand across the table and rubs soothing circles in her palm. The lighting is dark, which consciously or not, creates a very intimate setting. Lexa’s senses are in overdrive. Between the heartfelt words from Clarke to the lighting to the hand holding, it’s just all too much. She quickly gets up and insists on cleaning up since Clarke made dinner. She missed how Clarke’s face fell when she removed herself from the other girl’s grasp.

A few minutes later after everything is cleaned off the table, the girls are left locked in each other's gazes _yet again_.

Lexa attempts but fails to make small talk. Usually, the girls could talk about anything and everything. Conversation flows easily between the pair. In this moment, however, the air is charged with something. Something delicate yet primal. It's as if one long gaze or gentle touch could be the downfall of the walls they so carefully built up these past two months. Both girls know they should resist their feelings but it’s so fucking hard and with each moment green stares back at blue and blue stares back a green, it’s becoming more and more impossible to ignore to sexual tension wafting through the poorly lit living room.

It’s Clarke that finally breaks the silence.

“I promised to get you wet tonight Lexa. And I always keep my promises. Now close your eyes.”

There’s a moment of silence between them and the double meaning behind Clarke’s words are not unnoticed.

Lexa closes her eyes, mouth agape, waiting for further explanation. _Clarke didn’t mean for that too sound like **that**. Did she? No. No. No. She must have meant something else. Or she’s kidding. Yeah! That must be it. She’s just kidding._

Clarke pulls her out of the house and down the path to the shore. Lexa is in a daze over analyzing the sensation of Clarke’s fingers resting on her hips as she pushes her forward to an unknown location. When Lexa can feel the sand between her toes and the waves crashing down, she knows where she’s being led. Part of her is relieved while secretly (or not so secretly) the other part of her is very disappointed by the fact that this is what Clarke meant when she said she would be getting wet tonight. The ocean. Oh well. A girl can dream.

“Okay now strip.”

_Wait what?!_

“You want a free show Griffin?”

Lexa tries to be playful to cover up how nervous she is. Clarke lets out a hearty laugh at the banter.

“Maybe.”

“Clarke it’s almost November! The water is going to be freezing.”

The blonde stalked up to her, bringing her mouth to the corner of Lexa’s ear, knowing well enough how crazy it must drive the writer. She spoke in the most quiet of whispers as if there were people around who she didn’t want to hear what she had to say next.

“Sometimes you have to take a risk. Maybe that risk is reckless. Maybe it’s just dumb. But would you rather miss out on the chance altogether? I sure as hell know I wouldn't.

Clarke smirks. The artist sure loved to tease Lexa with her double meanings and innuendos, didn’t she? If Lexa wasn’t already staring deeply at Clarke’s eyes, she would have missed the way Clarke quickly looked up and down hungrily at her slim her figure.

There’s a moment where neither girls move. Frozen in time as if they are debating what to do next. Again, Clarke is the one to break the silence.

“Okay suit yourself. I’ll just take a swim by myself.”

The blonde sticks her tongue out and sheds herself of all her clothing. Clarke is left clad in a matching black bra and cheekster panties. Lexa’s mouth instantly goes dry as a familiar pulsing burns deep in her core. Fuck. Clarke’s ass was perfect. Lexa knew that Clarke had curves. Hell, she even felt those curves in her hands that night in the hotel two months ago. But to actually see them in the moonlight on a deserted beach. It took every ounce of her self control not to pounce on the artist right there and then.

Clarke turned around giving Lexa a full view of her big beautiful breasts. They were bigger than Lexa imagined (and who are we kidding, of course Lexa has imagined this moment). The brunette watched Clarke’s chest rise and fall with each breath. Lexa couldn’t help it. She let her eyes wander lower taking in the image of Clarke’s toned yet still soft stomach, the bow proudly sewn into the lace of Clarke’s panties, and the pale delicious flesh of the blonde’s inviting thighs. It was too much. Seeing Clarke like this and not being able to touch her. When Lexa reached her eyes, she _knew_. It was in that moment that she absolutely knew that Clarke wanted this just as much as she did. Her eyes instantly darkened to black. How could she have missed all the signs? One of the most obvious ones being Clarke stripping right in front of her begging her to take a risk. Yeah. Lexa needed to work on picking up on things.

So Lexa decided to take the risk. She stripped herself of all her clothes, leaving herself in red panties and a leopard print bra. When Clarke quirked her eyebrow at the questioning pattern, she blushed and bit her lip while returning her gaze to the ground.

“I never pegged you for a leopard print gal Lex.”

“Shutup. It’s my sister’s. I didn’t realize I would be stripping for you tonight.”

Clarke takes a step impossibly closer and tucks a strand of Lexa’s hair behind her ear.

“And if you have had known?”

“I-I would have uh”

Clarke thankfully cut her off from becoming a tongue-tied mess (too late).

“Relax. You’re cut when you’re flustered.”

Lexa’s confidence instantly boosted at the accidental compliment.

“Oh so you think I’m cute, huh?”

It was Lexa who took the next step. She could feel Clarke’s skin touching hers, causing both girls to shudder at the contact. Clarke didn’t respond. She couldn’t respond. She was impossibly turned on and the next sounds out of her mouth would probably be a whimper so instead of responding she nodded while trying to calm down her body.

Lexa was looking down at the blonde as she was much taller than the younger girl. She brought her hands to rest on Clarke’s shoulders and looked straight in her eyes, to see if this is really what she wanted. Lexa _needed_ to make sure Clarke wanted this as much as she did. They stayed like that for a beat. No movements. No sounds other than the crashing waves a few feet before them. Lexa seemed to have found what she was looking for because in the next moment she leaned down to connect her lips with Clarke’s.

Right before their lips could mold together, however, Lexa released a hot breath and whispered just loud enough for Clarke to hear.

“I believe you mentioned something about being wet tonight Mrs. Griffin?”

Clarke smiled with her eyes and moved to the remaining space between their mouths. The kiss started gentle as if they were exploring each other for the first time, and in some ways they were. Clarke moved her hands to Lexa’s hair to push her closer as Lexa’s hands wandered down the blonde’s curves, resting on Clarke’s hipbones. 

Lexa cautiously swiped Clarke’s bottom lip with her tongue. Clarke smiled into the kiss. She could tell Lexa was nervous that she would pull away again, but this time there was no way in hell she was pulling away. This time it was all Clarke and Lexa. Fuck the consequences.. at least for right now. Right now was about the fine line between want and need and how beautifully those lines blurred for the duo. The way they craved for each other's touch and yearned for the other’s mind, bodies, and souls. The pull was too strong to deny. It was time for them to brace the inevitable. 

After all, Clarke and Lexa always have been inevitable.

Changing angles, Clarke sucked hard on Lexa’s bottom lip. Next, she moved to nip and softly bite as she grazed Lexa’s jaw with her teeth. Clarke pressed hard open mouth kisses to Lexa’s long gorgeous neck, leaving reddish marks in her wake. Lexa left out a soft whimper followed by a quiet sob of pleasure. 

Neither were sure how long they were like this. Kissing under the stars with only the warm of one another’s arms to protect them from the cool fall breeze. It was cliche, but so fucking perfect. So fucking hot. Their skin was covered in goosebumps from both the cold night air and the sensations of touching each other so intimately, so needily. 

Lexa was just about to grab at Clarke’s legs to place the girl below her in the sand when a light was flashed in their eyes. Fuck. Of course. Of all the nights for the beach security to patrol the deserted end of the beach, it had to be now. I mean technically the beach was private property for the five houses that stretched across the shore, and Clarke did in fact own one of those homes. So _technically_ they weren’t doing anything wrong. But _really_ they were. They were, after all, caught in a pretty scandalous position. This is the exact kind of thing Clarke was trying to avoid. If one of the security guards recognized her, she was screwed (and not in the way she hoping to be screwed tonight unfortunately).

Lexa looked like a deer in headlights. The poor girl surely doesn’t do impulsive things like this _ever_. Lexa is a very organized person who adores structure. This most definitely wasn’t that. Surprisingly enough, the adrenaline of it all was sort of - _fun?_ Lexa never did anything dangerous or adventurous. This was certainly new, but she couldn’t lie and say it wasn’t exciting. Clarke Griffin might just be changing her for the better and vice versa.

“Shit Lexa. What did we do?”

Clarke looks terrified in this moment. _Oh shit of course. This could be really bad for Clarke._ If something is bad for Clarke, it’s bad for Lexa by association. Lexa's overcome with this intense desire to protect Clarke from harm's way. ‘Well there’s only one way out now’ Lexa thinks.

“RUN!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Clarkey and Lexa are very confused on who they are to eachother. Their emotions and actions sometimes might seem out of whack but that's probably because what feels right and what they believe is right are two very different things at the moment. Thus, they tend to think one thing one second, say something else the next, and act completely different a minute later.
> 
> I meant to write smut in this chapter, but it just ended up going in another direction. Oops! Don't worry the good stuff is coming sooner than later I promise!
> 
> Thank you for all the kudos and comments. They make my day :)


	6. Is There an Us?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the affair really begins..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the very very long delay! I started other fics and life got busy. I'll try to update this one more often but I have to get back to updating 'Leaving Home' more regularly too as that is my main fic for the time being. Sorry for any mistakes, I wrote this very late last night. Enjoy!

“RUN”

Lexa grabs Clarke’s hand and pulls her in the opposite direction of the house, leaving their clothes behind. They run on the dark beach and under the pier. The beach security must be very bored as they chase them and seem to be catching up.

“Shit Lex..they’re close.” Clarke says in between her heavy breathing. The blonde is an artist. She hasn’t run like this since she was on her middle school’s track team.

“Just keep running. They’ll get tired of this eventually.” Lexa says with little to no heavy breathing. The author works out quite a lot so she’s barely breaking a sweat here.

“Wait follow me!” Clarke whispers and pulls Lexa to the deep end of the pier, under the boardwalk. The pair hunches down and hides. Flashlights bright as ever flashing around looking for them. The cops are only a few feet away. All they have to do is turn the corner and flash their lights and they’re done for. The guards will surely recognize Clarke as Finn Collin’s wife. Everyone knows the Collins thanks to all the flashy magazine headlines. Plus Clarke is well known herself. And then everything Clarke worked so hard for in her life will crumble. Clarke and Lexa are holding their breaths waiting for the consequences of their little beach rendezvous to come crashing into them like the rough ocean waves but it never comes.

“Gary let’s just give it a rest yeah? I’m tired and it was prob two college kids making out.” One of the guards calls out.

“Yeah alright. Let’s go grab a coffee.” The other says and as soon as darkness blankets the pair once more and there are no sounds of the two guards, Lexa and Clarke let out their bated breath. The author and artist look at each other and start laughing.

“That was definitely interesting.” Clarke says in between laughs. 

“Everything about being with you has been very interesting so far Clarke.” Lexa softly says and the air around them suddenly changes and grows more affectionate, loving even. Lexa clears her throat, realizing this isn’t the time or place as they’re under a pier very naked.

“How are we going to get back to the house without any clothes?”

“Well it’s dark we should be okay.” Clarke mumbles, her eyes focused on those delectable lips she had just been kissing fifteen minutes before.

Lexa smirks a little, seeing that Clarke is distracted. Lexa waves her hand in front of the blonde’s face and Clarke blushes, realizing she’s been caught ogling.

“Sorry.” Clarke rushes out, obviously embarrassed.

“It’s quite alright. Let’s just get back to the house first yeah?” Lexa insecurely inquires. She’s not entirely sure if Clarke wants to continue this little tryst or if that kiss was a lapse in judgement.

Clarke nods and cups one of Lexa’s cheeks. The brunette audibly gulps as Clarke’s wet lips press against hers briefly but with intense fervour. Lexa looks at her with lust and curiosity in her eyes.

“Sorry, I just need one for the road.” Clarke smiles and Lexa laughs and shakes her head.

Clarke grabs Lexa’s hand and Lexa has to stop herself from swooning. Clarke’s hand in hers feels so good. It’s astonishing to Lexa how just one touch from the blonde can light her whole body on fire and warm her icy heart. Lexa might be very successful in writing books about romance. Hell, the magazines are calling her the new Nicholas Sparks but that doesn’t mean romance comes easy for her. After Costia, she closed up her heart. The only person that managed to get through was the girl she met at a train station one night. Her what if has finally become her right now. And it’s so fucking complicated because she’s married. Clarke is married. Lexa isn’t a homewrecker but when Clarke’s rough artist hands slip in hers or her gentle tongue slips in her mouth, the romance author just can’t will herself to care about the entitled prick that Clarke is wed to.

They stealthily get to the house without incident and are now standing in just their bra and panties in Clarke’s living room. Illuminated by the natural light of the moon, Clarke can see the sexy sharp edges of Lexa’s killer jawline and her vibrant emerald pools hungrily scanning every portion of her curves. There’s only a beat of silence between them before Lexa’s eyes finally meet Clarke’s and then it’s settled for both of them. There’s no turning back. 

Both girls take the two necessary steps needed to have their bodies flush against one another. Lexa toned abs rub up against the soft warm skin of Clarke’s stomach. The blonde pulls Lexa down for a bruising kiss. Lexa gasps into Clarke’s mouth as she grabs the artist’s thighs and walks forward. Her aim was to carry Clarke upstairs but then the blonde starts sucking and nipping on her neck. One of Clarke’s hands reaches under Lexa’s bra and squeezes her breast. She twists and tugs on the hardening nipple and her other hand makes quick work of unhooking the brunette’s bra.

“Klark” Lexa reverently whimpers. It’s been so fucking long since she’s been touched by someone other than herself. And the fact that the person that’s touching is Clarke only makes matters a million times more intensified and passionate. Lexa feels familiar wetness seeping through Clarke’s underwear and onto her lower abdomen as Clarke is wrapped tightly around her waist.

“Take me on the table Lexa.” Clarke huskily whispers against the flush skin on her cheeks before pulling her in for another wet raw kiss. Lexa’s mouth has gone dryer than the Sahara Desert and all words have escaped her. She’s a published author and yet her vocabulary right now is limited to ‘Klark’ and ‘fuck.’ So Lexa just nods. She nods and prepares to make Clarke Griffin come harder than anyone has before.

They reach the kitchen counter and Lexa harshly pushes the blonde on the elongated dining room table. Clarke pulls Lexa on the table on top of her and roughly places her leg in between Lexa’s thighs, already feeling the brunette’s essence coating her through her panties. Lexa is quivering on top of her as Clarke firmly squeezes her ass and encourages a wild grinding rhythm. Lexa is barely suppressing her urge to hump Clarke’s leg until she orgasms like a horny inexperienced teenager. But _fuck_ is Lexa aroused with her whole body on fire.

The brunette moves her hand to Clarke’s upper back and urgently unclasps Clarke’s bra. If her senses weren’t already overwhelmed before they sure are now. Clarke throws her bra off completely and Lexa immediately latches onto one of Clarke’s breasts with a hunger unparalleled to anything she’s ever felt. Lexa is ravenous as she sucks and licks at her lover’s tough nipple. 

“Lexa that feels so...good. Oh god.” Clarke sobs out, her back arching into Lexa’s touch and her hand at the nape of the brunette’s neck pushing her further into her chest. Lexa is still grinding on Clarke’s thigh, her panties completely soaked through and through. The harsh fabric of her underwear is frustrating her to no end as all she desires in this moment is to be skin to skin with Clarke. She releases Clarke’s breast with a loud wet popping sound and the blonde whines at the loss of a wet mouth encircling her nipple. 

Lexa briefly detaches from Clarke to remove her own underwear as Clarke does the same. Not five seconds later, Lexa is climbing back on top of Clarke and moaning into their wet kisses as soon as her clit receives any semblance of attention from Clarke’s thigh. Clarke snakes her hand down Lexa’s shuddering body and reaches her wet folds. Lexa heaves as Clarke moves in tight circles _almost_ hitting the spot Lexa desperately needs but never quite hitting where she needs her most. Lexa writhes and arches into the Clarke’s palm and the blonde smirks. She rubs Lexa’s clit once she’s gathered more wetness and Lexa full out cries out in pleasure at the contact.

“Klark please.” Lexa whimpers as Clarke speeds up her ministrations.

“What do you need?” Clarke says in her ever so sexy raspy voice as Lexa swears she’s about to combust.

“Fingers. I need your fingers inside me.” Lexa grunts out, moving her hips and pushing more and more into Clarke’s hand. 

“Ride them baby.” Clarke whispers and Lexa moans at the command. Clarke angles her fingers just right and Lexa sits up so that she’s straddling the blonde. The brunette slowly impales herself on two of Clarke’s long perfect fingers and her walls immediately start clenching at the sensation. Lexa closes her eyes and can’t seem to control her body as she pushes down on Clarke’s shoulders with her hands and starts to furiously ride Clarke’s fingers with the artist’s thumb brushing up against Lexa’s throbbing clit with every movement.

Lexa can feel a welcomed coiling in her stomach and curling of her toes as she keeps her fast pace, her orgasm violently taking over her body causing her to see stars.

“Umph.. Klaaaaaark... Yes right there! Yes!.. Yes!!” The brunette screams out as she comes all over Clarke’s fingers. Her inner walls thumping to a melodic beat as she comes down from her high. Clarke slowly slips out of her as Lexa lays breathlessly down right next to Clarke on the table. Lexa swears that she has never had such an intense orgasm. Clarke Griffin is definitely the best sex she’s ever had.

Clarke shifts her body so that her elbow is propped up and she’s staring down at the green eyed goddess that is Lexa Woods. She tucks a few strands of her unruly curls behind her cute little ears. Lexa’s eyes are still closed and she’s humming happily. In this moment, Clarke feels at peace. No..more than at peace. She feels complete and happy. Does that even make sense? Clarke wonders. The blonde can’t imagine ever leaving this moment. Her and Lexa seem to be two magnets and no matter where they go in life, they always find each other. Clarke never believed in fate or ‘meant to be’ or even soulmates. But when she looks down at the flush and smiling Lexa Woods in post orgasm bliss, she can’t remember why she doesn’t believe in all those happily ever fairytales. Because maybe...just maybe..she found hers.

Lexa’s eyes flutter open and she finds blue staring right back her with such warmth. Lexa is naked and literally just rode the blonde’s fingers but for some reason the affectionate gaze of Clarke’s stare right now is making her blush and bite her lip. Lexa has tried to stop herself from falling for Clarke. She stopped herself at the train station all those years ago and it was the biggest mistake of her adult life. And now that she has a second chance, she’s going to sure as hell take it. Insecurity flashes through her eyes as she wonders if this was just sex to the blonde. I mean she _is_ married. She vowed to love someone else for the rest of her life. But maybe this isn’t just physical for the blonde..maybe she feels it too..the strong undeniable both physical _and_ emotional connection they share.

“Lex what’s going on in that beautiful brain of yours?” Clarke gently says as her oh so naughty fingers trace Lexa’s jawline.

“I was just thinking about us.” Lexa sadly says, never breaking eye contact. Clarke’s face adorably scrunches up in confusion.

“Oh yeah? What about us?”

“Well for starters, is there even an us? I’m just trying to wrap my head around this. Last I checked, you’re married. I don’t want to be just an affair to-” Lexa’s words are cut off when Clarke takes swollen bottom lip in between her own. Lexa tangles her hands in Clarke’s hair and deepens the kiss, immediately forgetting what they were even talking about a few seconds ago.

Clarke meant for the kiss to be chaste and reassuring but it turned into something else completely. Lexa’s tongue is dancing around with her own as the blonde shifts her weight on top of the author. Lexa spreads her legs a little, allowing Clarke the room to straddle one of her legs. Lexa moves her leg a little and feels Clarke’s wetness spreading on her hot skin. 

Before things escalate any further though, Clarke detaches her lips from Lexa’s. Lexa chases her lips for a moment and Clarke lightly laughs. The artist rests her forehead against Lexa’s and lazily smiles.

“Sorry I got carried away.” Clarke happily sighs content with Lexa’s strong arms wrapped around her waist protectively.

“If you couldn’t tell, I really didn’t mind.” Lexa smiles right back at her until the nagging feeling of this being just sex to Clarke comes back and hits her at full force. Clarke notices the sudden change in the woman underneath her and gently cups her cheeks.

“Lexa this isn’t just some affair to me.” Clarke says softly but with all the passion in the world. Lexa’s defeated stare turns into a hopeful gaze.

“It isn’t?” Lexa asks with awe laced in her tone.

Clarke nods a ‘no,’ her sweaty forehead still pressed against Lexa’s.

“Absolutely not. I know I’m married but there hasn’t been love there in a while...maybe ever. That’s no excuse I know but there is more to the story than reaches the eye. I promise I’ll tell you anything and everything you want to know okay? I just..god this isn’t just sex. I need you to understand that. For me atleast, this is so much more.”

Clarke finishes her spiel, her eyes watery and her mouth turned upward in a smile. Lexa smiles with a wide toothy grin. The author’s smile washes away as she slowly and purposefully kisses Clarke. This kiss is gentler but with equal passion as before, if not more. Clarke moans into the kiss and steadily moves her hips deliciously, her clit rubbing up against Lexa in the most electrifying of ways. 

“Mmph Lex…” Clarke’s orgasm is quietly building and the blonde is letting out the most sinful of whimpers and whines. 

“What do you want Clarke?” Lexa asks breathlessly in between kisses.

“This. This is all I need. I’m close.” Clarke says as her eyes remain tightly shut. Lexa nods and starting sucking bruises into the blonde’s neck. Neither girl is paying attention to the fact that hickeys on the married woman’s neck isn’t perhaps the best idea. Clarke has never been so turn on in her life just from humping someone’s fucking leg. But she can find it in herself to stop or ask for more. If Lexa uses her tongue or fingers right now, Clarke thinks she’ll actually pass out. The blonde is so tightly wound...her muscles stiffening. Her entire body is on the edge of falling over.

The rickety old table is squeaking with each unabashed movement. Clarke’s heavy breaths and naughty moans fill the air as Lexa continues her descent down to Clarke’s breasts. Lexa takes a nipple in her mouth and that’s the end for Clarke. Her orgasm comes barreling into her. Her back arches slightly as she loudly sobs out Lexa’s name with all the love and adoration she can muster. One of Lexa’s hands are on her ass encouraging her movements to help prolong her orgasm. Clarke has never felt so safe in her life. Lexa is so gentle and loving with her. She collapses on top of the brunette and Lexa hums sweetly in her ear as she lovingly caresses the creamy skin of Clarke’s back. Clarke nuzzles deeper into Lexa’s neck and places soft kisses there. The earlier part of their first night together (but certainly not their last) was fast and rough but now it’s sweet and tinged with love. It’s not just sex. It’s so much more than that. But of course nothing can be simple and the complications of Clarke’s marriage will soon come stampeding at them at full force.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have a clear plot where I'm planning on taking this but I'm open to suggestions if y'all want to see anything in particular. Thanks to all comments and kudos on the piece. I promise you, I haven't abandon this fic :)


End file.
